The third volume of Helen Garner's Diaries, How to End a Story (2021) covers the years 1995-1998. During this time she continues her work as a writer in the aftermath of the success of her book The First Stone (1995).
She captures the creative differences between them in her diaries as follows:
'I say that since we've been together our lives have been arranged in such a way as to facilitate only his work needs: that he's an imaginative writer and needs seclusion in order to write, so we've got things set up domestically to create the best possible conditions for this. On the other hand, I'm a writer who works off and is nourished by the events of daily life, which means our living arrangements actively work against what I need...' (p 143-144)
V has an artist friend X and spends increasing amounts of time with her. V compartmentalises X and his wife, keeping them away from each other and telling them both untruths. Garner attends a psychologist in an effort to reconcile her feelings, which V finds threatening. He also dislikes her writing in her diary, fearing he will be written about. As she learns more about his infidelity, Garner becomes increasingly erratic and self-doubting.
Meanwhile, Garner is troubled about her work. She continues to write reviews and various pieces for publication, but feels she has lost her ability to write fiction. The betrayal by her husband - the lies more than the infidelity - has impacted her in so many ways. Through her diaries she reflects upon the sadness and isolations feels, and finds the strength she needs to face up to the truth.
These diaries again show Garner's genius as a writer. She is frank, fierce and witty. Garner writes with such immediacy and intimacy that one cannot help but feel connected to her.
My review of Garner's previously published diaries also appear on this blog: