Portrait of a Marriage: The Missus

I am not sure where I got the notion to read Evan S Connell's novels Mr Bridge (1959) and Mrs Bridge (1969) but it became an obsession. Getting my hands on a copy of Mrs Bridge was easy enough, but everywhere I looked was out of stock of Mr Bridge. Although I have had Mrs Bridge for several months, I did not want to start reading in case I never found her companion novel. Fortunately, late last year my set became complete and I have now had the absolute joy of reading these novels.

Mrs Bridge is the story of an upper middle-class family in Kansas City, spanning the period between the First and Second World Wars. It is told from the perspective of Mrs Bridge, a housewife with three children. Her husband is a lawyer who spends most of his time, including evenings and weekends, at work. With live-in help and a largely-absent partner, Mrs Bridge has plenty of time on her hands so she spends her days visiting other society women, attending her country club and shopping.  But beneath this simple tale of a seemingly hum-drum middle-class domestic life lies something profoundly engaging.

Told in 117 short, chronological chapters, we observe Mrs Bridge and her family through the social change and upheaval of the 1920s, 30s and 40s. Each chapter has a title - 'Tea Leaves', 'Chaperone', 'The Hat' - and then a vignette written in the most concise, arresting language that perfectly paints a moment in time for this family. The cumulative effect of reading these scenes is an empathy for these characters and a desire for their happiness.

Mrs Bridge is a fantastic, complex character. She values manners above all and is acutely aware of the expectations of society. She wants things to be just right - the right kind of guest towels, the right amount of Christmas decorations, her children socialising with the right sort of people - and the fear of being judged weighs heavily on her. Relying on adages of her own upbringing, Mrs Bridge knows how things should be, but at every turn her world view is challenged. 

The Bridges are a conservative, traditional family. Mrs Bridge defers to her husband with an unwavering faith that he knows best. At the same time, her hesitation to take action causes her discomfort. Even when she has a different view, she does not voice her opinion as she had 'for nearly a century had done as he told her' (p 112). She limits herself to conform to the image of a dutiful wife and mother which she feels she needs to present.

Her children are a mystery to her. The eldest Ruth is distant. She is most fond of her daughter Carolyn, who is very much like her father. Her son Douglas is an oddity to whom she cannot relate. Indeed Douglas provides much of the novel's humour as Mrs Bridge is routinely shocked and perplexed by his actions like building a tower of junk in a vacant lot, concealing a pornographic magazine, or getting into a rock fight with another boy. 

Yet there is something within Mrs Bridge that longs for a different life. From the outset we learn that her first name is India, which seems to her 'that her parents must have been thinking of someone else when they named her' (p1). After all, she could never live up to the excitement of her name. She is eager to learn and over the course of the novel she takes up various hobbies only to drop them unmastered - learning Spanish, painting, reading. Mrs Bridge briefly sees a therapist to address an unnamed sadness, a lack of meaningful connection.

Underneath all of this is Mrs Bridge's concern about her husband's affection. He works hard to provide the life they need, and the family wants for nothing. He expresses his love through buying her things. But Mrs Bridge is lonely and longs to spend more time with him, which she gets when he takes her on a grand tour of Europe. 

I absolutely adored Mrs Bridge although I cannot exactly pinpoint why. Connell's writing is brilliant as he infuses each scene with wit and irony. He uses such concise prose that the reader immediately understands the scene. The novel works because Connell makes the reader care for this family and even though modern life is so different from the setting of this book, the human experience is instantly relatable.

Immediately upon finishing this novel I commenced reading Mr Bridge. A separate review will follow.